It is 30 years from now (2048) and colonisation has become a way for Earthlings to survive. The Robinson’s are a family who have been tested to join the Resolute: a spacecraft which will take them to colonise a new world but guess what guys, the Robinson’s journey came crashing down (quite literally) into an unfamiliar planet. They become:
As soon as you have a child it is easy to think yourself as, ‘Mummy,’ before you remember what your name is. I’ve been calling myself ‘Mummy’ for 7 years now and as I sit there watching re-runs of Paw Patrol for the 100th time,
singing Twinkle Twinkle in various musical styles it was easy to think, ‘who am I?’ and, ‘is this all that I am now?’ If you are anything like me, you go on a mental hunt for your lost identity. You look under files of good memories, and the drawers of bad, and after a while, you realise it is right there in front of you.
I do believe that before anything else I am ‘Mummy’ first but I am also Elizabeth or Lizzee (spelt in that way because it’s different, it’s quirky, it simply looks nicer on the page.) But what can I do to find myself again? Here are a few ideas to help you. You may have changed slightly from before you were a parent but just knowing what you like, what you dislike, how you prefer your coffee can make a huge difference. So grab yourself a mug of your favourite beverage, mine is a boring cup of joe minus the sugar because it is far too early for a glass of gin – wait I don’t even have any gin. Oh well, let’s get stuck in!
We don’t all love to read but reading doesn’t necessarily mean a book. It can be a magazine of your choice. You could read articles on the internet about things that interest you. You may even find something to read that you didn’t find interesting before. After I had Little Man, I didn’t sleep well and then one day I got an email from Amazon saying that I could download a free book. So, I downloaded Bernard Cromwell’s The Last Kingdom. I read that book within two days/nights and purchased the following books in the collection. It was then that I remembered that I enjoy reading and I found a new love for Historical Fiction – a genre I had never read before and I wasn’t big on History as a child either. I also slept when Little Man wasn’t keeping me awake.
One of them things that many people notice is that when you have children, your circle of friends may get smaller. Mine did and it was easy to believe I had no friends but sometimes we need to put ourselves out there. If you have five minutes, give a friend a call. If you can manage a time to see them, maybe have a cheeky glass of wine, then go for it. Your friends are a reflection of you and if anyone can bring you back to yourself, I am sure they can, for an hour or two at least.
You don’t need to go out all fancy to have an evening with your partner. I mean I think I have nailed the pizza and Netflix thing but whatever you want to do. It is important to have some time with your partner. Do something you guys love to do or if you want to go really crazy, do something different like try a new restaurant or plan an evening at a hotel. Just something for you to look forward to, to get excited about and although you will miss them mucky cheeky faces, and yeah, you will, you can come home and give them lots of cuddles. If you’re a single parent, you could go out with a friend or if you are ready to date, then go on a date and see what’s out there – you may become a fancy wine taster or try shell-fish for the first time.
Okay, TV could mean YouTube if you really want it, too. If you have an hour to spare which may help you stop singing The Wheels on the Bus then go for it. I don’t think I have watched daytime TV in a long time, so now I binge Netflix shows that I would never have watched years ago and some have become favourites. Jane the Virgin has become a wonderful light-hearted watch. I am currently bashing out Gossip Girl and I’m not going to lie, I think I do a fabulous Kristen Bell impression.
okay, so this is another one. Five minutes to think. What things did you enjoy before you had kids? What things did you do? What things did you believe and have them beliefs changed? Look yourself in the mirror and give yourself a compliment. ‘Hey, girl, you are rocking that messy mum bun, this morning.’ Turn any negative thought into something positive. Are you tired? That’s okay because you won’t be tired forever. Forgot to shower. It’s okay, shower later and maybe treat yourself to a bath bomb or your favourite shower gel. You want to watch Pokémon and relive your childhood youth for 20 minutes, watch it.
Be yourself as well as being a parent is important and if anything, it will teach your children something. Perhaps, they will love to watch Pikachu electrocuting some strange Pokémon that you have never seen before. Maybe they will love to read, listen to music. Heck they may join in with your songs, or tell you to shut up but if so keep singing. Show the world who you are as well as being a parent and your child will do the same.
Do you feel like you lost your identity when you became a parent? What things did you do to help you find yourself again? Let me know in the comments below!
This week, Nanny Car-Car surprised the kids with a trip to West Midlands Safari Park. It was an approximate 30 minute drive from where we live, excluding the fact we took a wrong turn. It was BBQ weather and by the time the safari was over, we felt like we were truly roasted.
In an earlier post, I wrote about how I dealt with an extremely traumatised Mini Me who was placed in ‘RED’ at school. (You can read it here.) The following week, we found something under a pile of junk mail.
My partner in parenting has been working varied shifts for the past 2 years. These can vary from early shifts (5 a.m. – 3 p.m.) to late shifts (3.pm – 11 p.m.). He may work a bank holiday, he may work every other weekend and although this can be frustrating in terms of family time together and life in general, I have conjured up a list of 3 pros as well as 3 cons.Read more
Every teacher I have ever spoken to has complimented on how beautifully behaved Mini Me is at school. That she is kind, polite and thoughtful but recently she came running out of school, crying to the point she couldn’t speak.
As an anxious, paranoid, sometimes socially awkward person, I had hoped that by the time Mini Me would start school that the school playground would force me to face my social anxiety. You know, kick my arse into ignoring the little voices in my head. Box me in with it’s brightly coloured, almost faded squiggles on the school play ground and push me to face my fears. Has it? I’ll let you know in time.