The other day, I was rudely awoken by my boyfriend of 5 years, Luke screaming at the top of his lungs “ANYYYY OLD IRONNNN.” As I lay there staring at the ceiling confused, I realised that the rather irritating voice my boyfriend was projecting had become an echo to the even-more-so annoying scrap man!
I have always heard my boyfriend mimic accents and such, a skill he is actually quite good at, but still to this day, I have no idea what it is exactly these men who like to torture us with their megaphones are shouting. It seems to be any old nonsense which is roared throughout our streets, almost begging for any old scrap iron laying around our houses. I get they need to make a living but why they have this need to switch their megaphones on at 6am, I never know.
So this shouting between the scrap man and Luke had almost become a war between them. Each projecting their voices at each other trying to see who was the loudest and with the scrap-man having the advantage of a megaphone, it is clear Luke was going to lose. I believe that maybe they realised he was taking the mick (to put it politely) and thought to do it more. I swear at one point they stopped right outside our house! This war got so bad, that nextdoor’s Chocolate Labrador started to bark. In the 5 or so years they have lived there, I have rarely heard him bark and after I shouted downstairs “SHUT UP”, he started to bark also. Whether the dog was saying the same, I don’t know but hey I don’t speak dog.
It’s times like these I wished the not-so-real but real Ironman would just fly in with all his crimson glory and would just unibeam them into the next street or two. I couldn’t imagine Tony Stark would put up with such a shouting match which was my house early that morning.
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